a starting point

http://www.whale.to/vaccines/krasner7.html

good info, not hard to read, not too much medical jargon to look up.

stop. think. inform.

click to enlarge.

new peanut-isms

whoa whoa whoa. this is her cue for us to sing row row row your boat.

when i say mana mana, she says doooodoooodooo. which is close enough for government work.

she puts her arms up in the air (to have her shirt taken off) when we say 'skin a rabbit.' i know, i know. barbaric. but effective, and by the time she's old enough to get it, i won't need to say it anymore.

she ate chicken for the first time tonight. i'm still not sure how i feel about meat. she finished all of it, plus some green beans, and some noodles.

she is mostly over her infection. still harboring a sort of junky cough. three days of antibiotics left. gotta say tho, the probiotics did prevent the assfaucet from getting turned on. thank god.

she is finally giving kisses to daddy and grandma. i think they were starting to develop complexes. and, they're now dry, closed mouth kisses.

i babysit for some kids, and she shares nicely. when the baby cries, she tries to climb up in my lap, and pat him on the head. or she's trying to knock him out, but either way, it's cute.

she totally dances to the theme songs of the shows on sprout.

she's got the hang of peekaboo with objects (like blankets, books, and anything else she can hold in front of her face or over her head.)

her new word of the moment is 'see?' wherein she will point to something, and say 'see?'

she's also saying baby. and here.

we bought a potty seat today. i haven't unpacked it yet.

she feeds her dolls pretend food. but gives them a real sippy. i find this hysterical.

she's heavy into sharing food she's already had in her mouth. i love her, but this is kind of gross.

she really likes india.arie. i'm so proud.

moved the photos

back to the may 2006 arcive. they were slowing down load time.

short update.

so, i was right, and peanut did indeed have a sinus infection. we now have the evil pink goo of death. she hates it, and i have to give her a teaspoon (which, was always a small amount, until i had a baby, and then, it seemed like a gallon...) twice a day. she takes tiny squirts of it, from the medicine syringe, and then chugs an ounce from the sippy. tiny squirts, chugs. she's peed a lot today. i suspect, that between the amoxicillan, which in pink, and the benedryl, which is red, her poop will be like, fuschia. i went to the health food store, and got some baby strength probiotics. i've been hiding in the juice, but what i like about jarrow is that on the directions, they say you can do that, or mix it with milk, or water or formula, or (drumroll) dab some on the breast before breastfeeding! i was like 'whoa.' i lurve me some hippies. anyway. i'm hoping the probiotic this time will prevent the ass-faucet that got turned the last time we used antibiotcs. as you may know, i'm not down with weird poo. but it does kinda make you wonder. if matter and anti matter combine to decimate humanity...what about the biotics?

i hate me some bitches.

one of the benefits touted in the mood cure, is that amino acids are supposed to help pms. well. here i am on CD22, and i am hating life. i've upped my dose in all areas, but i'm still really rather grumpy. it doesn't help, that peanut is sick, and i KNOW it is bacterial, but the stupid ped won't give me antibiotics unless i take her in. which i don't want to do, b/c i'm not sure where i stand with medicaid right now, as her one thing ended, and i don't have the new paperwork for her new coverage. it's not like i'm asking for morphine. just some effing zithromax. our normal doc isn't in, so i had to talk to the guy who told me that peanuts reflux was all in my head, or, at best, only a laundry problem, and then, we ended up in hospital for spitting blood. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

i hate that fucker. i will call tomorrow, and talk to our real doc. but i'm seriously considering switching peds. i mean, it's so basic! she had a cold. her symptoms subsided for a few days, and then, all of a sudden, she was a snot faucet again, and had a fever. her snot is thick and yellow, and while that by itself does not signal infection, the fact that her breath, which usually has no smell to it at all, smells kinda funky. and i know it's not food, because she doesn't want to eat. she's nursing non-stop, which, while i know it is best for her, is killer on me, since the week before my period makes me hate on nursing.

i suppose the thing that makes me the angriest, is that the peds always look at me like i'm a bad mommy when i decline antibiotics for ear infections. but her ear infections ALL happened right after a cold. which is VIRAL. so antibiotics wouldn't do a goddamned thing. this, however, has manifested itself in such a way, that leads me to believe it is a bacterial sinus infection. and now, when i WANT the effing antibiotics, they're withholding them. bitches.

i need a drink.

i'm back!

so we went to gene's family reunion. it was fun. we took the train (i totally recommend sleeper cars when travelling with toddlers. i'm going to be lazy, and just copy my myspace blog over to this one to detail what went on at said reunion.

wow. so we're in Pa, at the family reunion. and his folks have webTV in lieu of a real computer. it's a whole different world wide web on tv. oddly, it supports myspace, with all its graphics intensive self, but not aol. which means, if the bitches have been true to form, i'm gonna have over 500 emails by the time i get home. (miss y'all! tell jonesy i miss her!) anyway. the reunion was fun. peanut was a DOLL! she cooed and sang e i e i o, and laughed, and snuggled, and basically charmed the pants off of everyone. it was great. she's getting a little cold, tho, so much of yesterday was spent tailing whoever happened to be holding her, and popping up with a tissue when she was distracted. in somewhat of an exciting and revolting turn of events, she's learned to sniff the snot back in. this seems like a good thing, but apparently she swallows it, because she pooped last night, and it was horrible. everybody...well, okay, not everybody, but a large portion of genes fam. smokes. and weirdly, being around it simultaneously made me crave a newport, and slightly ill.

we got so many compliments on peanut. aside from the fact that she's the prettiest baby ever born into the family, they seem to think that she's a 'good' baby. by this, they mean that she wasn't wary of going to new people, and she didn't cry the whole time we were there. we get these types of comments a lot, and on the way home last night, gene was like, 'do you think she's slow? i mean, why isn't she freaking out like all the other babies?' not realizing that he was just being a dork,i launched into my whole AP makes better babies spiel. he let me prattle on for a while, and then he said 'pookers? shush. i was kidding. we have the best baby, because she has the best mommy.' *snivle* i added 'and daddy.'

so we were at a popular amusement park for this reunion. and, as fate would have it, i did have to pee while there. so i wander into the bathroom, and pee in a toilet that was so absurdly low to the ground, i might as well have been squatting over a hole, biafra style. anyways, i go to wash my hands, and there, off to my left, next to the handicrapper, are 2 'nursing booths' which are really just stalls, with brown molded plastic chairs. on the one hand, i like that they thought far enuff in advance to have a place for nursing moms. some babies are distractible, and need a place w/o lights and screaming rollercoaster riders. some moms are bashful. but it was in the bathroom. EW! i mean, in true amusement park bathroom form, it smelled like pee. i wouldn't eat in there, even for a fearfactoresque amount of money. but the other thing that kinda bothers me, is the clandestine thing. like nursing needs to be hidden away behind a door. i mean, i nursed peanut at least 4 times yesterday, and i got no weird looks/comments. and so i'm experiencing some cognitive dissonance on this. because i can see the benefit of having a spot free of distractions for baby, but i don't like the idea of squirrling a breast feeding mother away, when you wouldn't do the same for a bottlefeeding mom. i think they should be called infant feeding booths, or something. but maybe i'm over thinking it. prolly not tho. i think there are some political ramifications here. but it's 10am, and lord knows my brain doesnt turn on for another 2 hours.

anyway. i'm going to go take a shower. those of you who have my digits, feel free to call. those of you who don't, shouldn't have deleted the spam that said for a good time, call...

so there ya go. the train ride home was great, b/c we got a sleeper car. so much better. and climate controlled. and free meals-well, at least, meals included with the price of the room. and we had a really sweet porteress, who was totally smitten with the peanut. it was adorable. and peanut was smitten with her. so cute. somewhere along the line, gene ended up with bersitis, but some arnica and some hot/cold therapy and a chiro appt took care of that.

i must go make dinner now.

head? meet wall.

so, once again, the bbc drama... there's a thread about discipline. and some peeps posted that they hit. as y'all know from previous postings, i tend to disagree with that. so i posted. and i went back to that thread today, and i decided i liked what i wrote enough to blog it. hows that for tootin ones own horn? here it is..

when redirection isn't working (ie, replacing the TV with the 'learning table') try sitting down, and hugging your toddler. say, 'i know you know not to touch the tv. were you trying to get my attention?' hold them, until they squirm to get down. when you set them down, point to the TV and say 'not for X' if they touch the TV again, take them back into your lap and hold them some more. mostly, toddlers are exploring (in which case, redirection should work) but when redirection fails, something else is in play. and usually, (at least at our house) it's because i've not connected with my child enough to keep her feeling balanced. when she feels balanced, she acts right. and i can usually tell when she's about to do something she has no business doing, like touch the TV, b/c first she'll whine for me, and if i'm in the midst of something, she'll walk over to the tv, and stand in front of it. i'll remind her 'not for peanut'. she may walk away and do something else, but usually she ends up back in front of the TV. then, she'll walk closer to it, and say 'no no.' so i know she knows that she's not supposed to be doing it. but she'll put her index finger on the screen, and then look at me. i think this is her way of saying 'stop cleaning/cooking/whatever and come hang out with me!' b/c she knows that when she touches the TV, she gets a reaction. and even at this early age, they understand that 'negative' attention is better than no attention, kwim?

imo, hitting, slapping, popping, tapping, snapping, smacking, spanking, whacking, whooping, whatever, are all just euphamisms for proving to yourself, that you can control a toddler. they don't make the connection. they don't, at this point understand, that, touching the TV makes you mad, so you hit. it inhibits the natural desire to learn, and explore. and as they get older, and more cogniscent, they'll see it for what it is, which is you setting up a powerstruggle that only you can win. ask yourself 'would i hit an adult over this? or would i talk my feelings out?' and then treat your child with the same respect. b/c the older they get, the more they will resent being reminded of your physical dominance. (which is all it is. it's certainly not exacting a logical response to actions at all.)

there are many ways to remind children to act according to your wishes. some of them are 'easy' 'quick' fixes, like hitting and other 'punishments' but these rarely get to the root of the misbehavior. some of them are longer, more drawn out methods, like 'logical consequences and natural rewards'. but even those can get twisted and used in a power struggle. generally, for this age, redirection, and positive interactions are enough to curb the misbehavior.

so many of us think that our job as parent is to control. in reality, our job as parent is to teach. it takes little time and effort to raise a compliant child, but it takes years to form a healthy adult. punishments, rewards, and other methods of control create a system for the child to buck. interaction, redirection, explanation, and logical consequences help the child to learn how to navigate their world in a positive way, rather than in a fearful or openly defiant way.

consider that our toddlers, in 15 months, have gone from squeaky sounds, to words. from being unable to hold their heads up, to toddling around. from a total liquid diet, to cocopuffs and organic fruit. they learn so much, so quickly. and they understand more than we know. so why not set the stage for raising a curious, independent child, who acts right, because he feels right. you'll still have to deal with tantrums, and meltdowns, because that's part and parcel of being a parent, and keeping a child safe. but you can do that, without diminishing them as a person, or treating them disrespectfully. it just takes a little longer.

why i hate randy newman

so, i let peanut watch tv sometimes. in the beginning, i was all, NO TV FOR MY KID! but, real life took over, and the fact is, sometimes she doesn't do well, sitting in the highchair while i unload the dishwasher. and she really wants to climb in it, when i let her be a free range peanut. so sometimes, i gate her in with PBS sprout. which sounds like it should be educational, but is really chock full of basic punitive drivel like thomas the tank engine (who needs to organize a rally of plebian engines to rise up and take down sir toppum hat) and angelina 'i'm such a friggin brat' ballerina.

but the thing that irritates me the most, aside from the above, is the bearnstein bears. i LOVED those books as a kid. and, actually, the cartoon isn't too bad. the parents use gentle discipline, they use logical consequences, they're attached to the cubs, and so basically, it's a great cartoon to let peanut watch. BUT. it has the effing dumbest theme song EVAR! allow me to give you an example.

they're kinda furry around the torso.
they're a lot like people, only moreso.
WHAT? QUE? of COURSE they're furry around the torso! they're fucking bears! and they're a lot like people...only more so? NO! they're fucking bears! like, i know it's just a theme song for a kids show, but put some fucking effort into making it make sense. especially since the fucker will be running through some poor parents head ALL FUCKING NIGHT! and, i know it's a country tune, and the bears are country bears, but the line when things go wrong as things might do makes me want to cut off my ear and send it to whatever sick soul penned that horrid ditty. jesus. it's not much wonder our kids can't fucking speak english. as things might do, indeed.

nursing at keyboard

because my computer chair is a la-z-boy recliner, and it rocks. i do this each night. she falls asleep contented, belly full, and i compulsively google to become a better mother. her newest tricks are saying no and shaking her head, and looking quzzical while asking 'whadijoodoo?' (translation what did you do?) this happens when one enters a room, even if they've only been gone 30 seconds. equally adorable, is her newfound ability to operate her own sippy. this actually makes me sad, a little bit. she used to be like a bipedal gerbil, trotting over to stand and suckle at the softspouted water bottle i'd dangle enticeingly, to keep her away from the phone/tv/remote/cat's tail. but now, she has mastered the art of grabbing the handles, shoving said spout into her mouth, and flinging her head back, as though ozzy himelf were cheering her on. she chugs an ounce without breaking a sweat, flops her head back into resting position, and tosses the sippy aside, careless, and onto her next task. so i'm glad we're still nursing. because each day, she takes so many steps out on her own. she can feed herself, she's learning to stick her feet out to have shoes placed on them, she knows to put her arms through the sleeves after a shirt has been pulled over her head...but each night, she crawls into my lap, latches on, and pats my chest until she falls asleep.

ally ally all come free.

waxing nostalgic

the rest of my previous post...

*yoga nursing
*baby yoga
*trying to walk away while still latched
*dancing to the ma-na-ma-na monster
*tackling the kitty (ditty)
*doing pat-a-cake when i thought you were far too small to get it
*learning the sign for 'itsybitsy spider' before learning the sign for mom, or milk
*laughing at sneezes
*laughing at me waving my feet in the air
*being an awesome travel partner, even at 2 months
*all those hazy 3ams, where it was just you, me, and portishead
*the first time you smiled at me
*the first time i smiled at you.

things i want to remember

things i don't think i've blogged about, but want to remember. a list!

*her little bill cosby wrinkly wake up faces when she was a newborn.
*her snuffly dinosaur noises
*the way she used to wiggle and wiggle when i'd get into nursing position
*learning to nurse her in the carseat
*cosleeping, when she'd wake up crying, but then turn and shove her face into my arm, and settle down
*the way she used to latch onto my lower lip in early babykisses style
*her endless fascination with cecil the ceiling fan. (and his sister cecilia)
*her little old jewish man noises
*her big, bum flappin fratboy farts, and her motorboat burps


more later. diaper time! woo!